Shame. Why has shame become the norm for so many people? It seems like an emotion and feeling that so many deal with. While my first thought about this word reminds me of all the chatter I have heard from those going through infertility, I know that shame crosses every generation and spectrum of people, no matter what situation they might be facing.

So what exactly is shame? Well first, shame is different from guilt. While guilt is feeling bad for what you have done, shame is feeling bad about who you are. It’s looking at yourself and feeling that you have a shortcoming. A person who has shame has a wrong or skewed perception of them self. A person who is experiencing shame probably feels unworthy and like they are a disgrace to others. They feel like whatever situation they are in is there fault or they did something wrong and they should be embarrassed. Shame always emphasizes sin’s effect on self-identity.

Unfortunately shame goes back to the fall of man in Genesis. And yes, while there was sin in the garden, the good news is we are under the new covenant and Jesus paid for your shame (as well as every other sin) on the cross. That means as a Christian you don’t have to be bound to shame, but can find freedom from it.

So how do you become unashamed? Well, you can’t do it on your own. But, just as John 8:32 says, “when you know the truth, the truth will set you free.” That means that when you put your identity in Christ and understand what His Word says about who you are in Him, then you can find freedom from any feelings of shame that you might be experiencing.

Let me remind you today that God doesn’t intend for you to feel any shame. You are loved. You are worthy. You are chosen. You can be set free! He wants you to see yourself just as He sees you and I can promise you that He never sees you as a shameful person.

Get rid the shame you have been living in and pursue a life that is full of freedom in Jesus! Ask God to forgive you and guide you throughout the process. Depending on who you are and what you are going through, this might not be a process that happens overnight. Seek counsel when, and if, needed. This is clearly a much bigger topic than one blog post, so I would be happy to discuss or pray with you if you desire. Whatever you do, fix your eyes on the things above, not of this world (or of yourself) (Col. 3:2) and pursue freedom in every area of your life.

Unashamed - In Due Time Blog


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  • Kelsa
    Posted at 06:48h, 13 May Reply

    Hi! Ended up here through your comment on todays First 5 study 🙂
    I so needed to read this! You really don’t read too much on this topic (or maybe I’ve just had blinders on unknowingly) and shame is something I didn’t even realize is an issue for me. But God is breaking down walls, and opening my eyes to realize I have been allowing satan to use shame to keep me from living the life I am called to!
    Thank you so much for allowing God to speak through you! I know we don’t always get to see the fruit of our labors, but I just wanted you to know that your words today have been very fruitful!

  • Rebecca Jo
    Posted at 09:11h, 13 May Reply

    Shame is so heavy to carry…
    hey – side note – I thought of you Sunday with the Mother’s Day message – the pastor was talking about if you look in the bible at all the women who struggled with infertility, they were all incredibly righteous women. You instantly came to mind my friend. <3

  • Lily
    Posted at 12:18h, 13 May Reply

    So beautifully said, Caroline! I felt shame for a while when we first found out, but I don’t anymore. It definitely didn’t happen overnight, but I’m glad I don’t feel it anymore!

  • Jeni
    Posted at 12:23h, 13 May Reply

    Hey girl!! This is word is in perfect season and there must be breakthrough coming! “Unashamed” as a theme keeps popping up! Have you heard about Christine Caine’s new book, Unashamed?? Such a great word! She was at my church in San Diego (C3 San Diego) for a women’s ministry event! so so so powerful! An anointed word from an anointed woman of God!!

  • Amy March
    Posted at 14:05h, 14 May Reply

    Love this! We talked about shame vs. guilt in my small group a few weeks ago and I had never really thought about it before.

  • Katie Westenberg
    Posted at 09:26h, 17 May Reply

    I’m learning shame can sneak in from the most unlikely of places, when I least expect it. And just when I think I have conquered it, I need this very reminder. Thank you for speaking truth!

  • Allison
    Posted at 11:45h, 17 May Reply

    Amazing post! Something that is not talked about alot, but that alot of us struggle with.

  • andrea
    Posted at 14:42h, 17 May Reply

    look up to God – even in the midst of the times!

  • Marie Wikle
    Posted at 19:39h, 17 May Reply

    Awesome post. so many let shame take over and they live behind a wall of shame. God can and will use them if they step out in faith

  • Mihaela Echols
    Posted at 21:49h, 17 May Reply

    Amen! We don’t have to feel shame because the cross is enough.

  • Faith
    Posted at 07:33h, 18 May Reply

    My favorite verse is Psalm 34:5 – “Those who look to Him are radiant, and their faces are never covered in shame.”

  • Amy
    Posted at 07:13h, 19 May Reply

    I feel like shame helps us identify when we “miss the mark” and sin. BUT, sometimes, after we tell Jesus we are sorry, we are tempted to still feel ashamed – and, like you said, that is not the Lord! The woman from Mark’s Gospel (Chapter 5) – was healed, but possible still felt ashamed. Jesus said to her (after she touched His cloak and was healed) to “go in peace and be free from your suffering.” She had been physically healed the moment she touched His cloak, but still – she had felt shame in her community for years. Now she was free – not only from physical suffering, but her shame as well. I agree with you, we need to resist the temptation of shame!

  • Tara
    Posted at 14:19h, 19 May Reply

    I heard once that Christians should never say, “Shame on you” because we don’t want to bring shame to someone, just repentance.

  • Jessa
    Posted at 19:13h, 03 June Reply

    I love this book. I am half way through it. I can’t wait to get home and read it.

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