28 Aug Guest Post: The Early Rains
Friends, I am super excited to have Jessica on the blog today. She blogs over at Grace While We Wait and I just adore her. Adore her! I am so glad that I have had the privilege to connect with her over the past year, I just wish I had known her longer. She has two adorable children via adoption and she is believing for a biological miracle as well. She will be at the Moms in the Making conference and I can’t wait to meet her. It’s always such a privilege to walk alongside of women with such amazing faith, like Jessica. Once you read her writing, you will see why I think she is just so incredible. And, could her family be any more gorgeous? I hope her post blesses you as much as it did me.
The Early Rains
My husband and I are coming up on seven years of waiting for a biological baby. We have adopted two beautiful children. The way they both came home to us is nothing short of a miracle. Just recently, we welcomed a new face into our family through foster care. We’re not sure how long he will stay with us, but for now, he is ours. That verse in Psalms that says “He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children,” hangs in our living room and every time I pass it, I smile. Because He truly has filled our home and hearts. And after all of those years of aching and longing, He made me a mother.
But we’re still praying, believing, and standing in faith that He has more children for us, and this time, biologically. We’re waiting on healing. And have been for what seems like forever. This waiting can often feel much like a desert. Dry. Exhausting. Barren.
But I’m finding here in this wilderness, something I would never find elsewhere… Him. I truly wouldn’t trade a day of this waiting for the deep friendship I’ve found here in Him. Hagar, in Genesis 16 ran away from Sarai into the wilderness and said, “Truly here I have seen him who looks after me.” Hosea 2 says that it’s in the wilderness where we no longer call Him, God, but Lover.
I know, without any doubt, I will become pregnant. But I also know, without any doubt, that He is after my heart. The Father is more concerned with my heart than the miracle on the other side of this desert. And it’s here, in this wilderness of waiting, where I’ve fallen in love with the Giver instead of only wanting the gift.
Psalm 84:5-7 has become my anthem. In the ESV it says, “Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose heart are the highways to Zion. As they go through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the early rain also covers it with pools. They go from strength to strength; each one appears before the God of Zion.”
In the Hebrew, this verse actually reads, HAPPY are those whose strength is in you, in whose heart are the highways to Zion (the fullness of the promise). As they transition through (as an attacking army passes through enemy territory-conquering them like a flood) the Valley of Weeping, they make it (they would actually dig holes in the ground, waiting for the rain) a place of springs; the early rain also covers it with pools. They go from strength to strength (like that of an army); each one appears (is seen) before the God of Zion.
I wish you were sitting in my living room and I could unpack every word in this passage. It’s so incredibly beautiful, and there is so much to glean there. But let’s just pretend you’re sipping your coffee and I’m talking a lot with my hands (because that’s what I do). I would tell you how this passage has become sustaining to me. Because I am His daughter, I get to walk through the valley of weeping, HAPPY! In faith, I dig holes in the desert to prepare for rain, because I know my Daddy will provide.
Several months ago, I started getting a nursery ready in faith. I have several wall hangings, a dresser, and the sweetest crib. I bought a new wrap, because I loved wearing my other babies. We even have wooden letters for this baby’s name. When I peek into that room, my faith rises. I pray for that sweet one and dream about the day my faith will be sight. I’m making room in the natural for something that is being birthed in the spirit.
Several weeks ago, when suddenly and very unexpectedly, we welcomed this new face in our family, the nursery became his bedroom. Now I find myself as a mama of three, but it looks very different from what we have been praying for and expecting.
I started diving deeper into that passage and learned about the early rains. In the Hebrew culture, the early rains came in the fall to help germinate the seeds that were just planted. Then in the spring, the latter rains came right before the harvest.
Now when I glance into the nursery and see it filled with transformers and legos, what I see is the early rain. That Papa God, in His kindness, has already filled that room with a child. And He will do it again. The latter rains are coming.
The harvest is right around the bend.
The wilderness of waiting doesn’t have to be a place that is dry, exhausting, and barren. It can actually be a place where you find intimacy and deep friendship with the Father. He’s after your heart. Eventually, the seasons change, and spring will be born from the winter in your life. You’ll find yourself rocking your miracle baby, basking in the beauty of the latter rains.
“Who is that coming up from the wilderness leaning on her beloved?” Song of Solomon 8:5
It will be you, friend.
PS. If you are going through infertility, please head over to ministry for support on your journey.
PPS. Have you picked up a copy of my book? Buy In Due Time, a 60-day devotional for hope + encouragement in the waiting.
PPPS. I created a group on facebook as an extension of my book + blog to discuss anything + everything. Women only! Come join us!