3 Years & Friending

Today, Colby and I celebrate 3 years since we got engaged (and yes, we do celebrate every anniversary possible; monthiversaries, engagements, etc – feel free to roll your eyes all you want). I posted our engagement story last year with some pictures so if you are up for reading a sappy story, please do!! He is out of town today, so we don’t have any plans, but it’s always a fun day to remember and celebrate.

Now onto an awesome series LifeChurch.tv just recently finished up. They did a 4-part series about friends. This series was full of lots of truth and was very convicting for me. I hope some of the points below hit home for you too!

Craig drove home the main point with this: “Show me your friends and I will show you future”.

Isn’t that the truth? Aren’t we influenced by the people we hang out with? Think about your top 2 or 3 closest friends. Think about the qualities they have, because most likely yours are very similar to theirs.

If your friends go out and party every Friday night, you are probably doing the same. If they bash their husbands during girls night, then yep, you most likely are too. If they tell crude jokes, you most likely are laughing or participating. I realize this isn’t always the case. But, even if you aren’t doing those things, no one wants to be around someone who is a bad influence on you. Do not be fooled. “Bad companions ruin good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33

What about those friends who encourage you on a bad day? Those who are devoted to spending time in the word or attending small group and church functions? Those who only speak life? If your top 2 or 3 friends are doing these things, then most likely won’t you want to as well? Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble. Proverbs 13:20

Craig brought up the topic of social media and how it has impacted friendships and relationships over the years. Isn’t that the truth? We have gone from phone calls to texting, emailing, or facebooking. It’s amazing to see how social media has caused friendships to deteriorate over the years. It actually makes me really sad to see that some people don’t ever want to answer their phone calls or return voicemails anymore. They would rather respond back via a text message.

I don’t know about you, but I want friends who walk life with me. I want them to walk through the trials (like now) and rejoice during the happy times. Most of us can say that going through a trial really makes us realize who are true friends are. This has definitely been the case for us.

You might be one friend away from changing your destiny. Who are your close friends? What can you do to be a better friend? Are your friends encouraging you? Are they influencing you to be a better person? Most likely who you hang out with predicts how your future will be.

Be a better friend. Call people. Share your weaknesses; they are the best way to connect with people. Be present. Spend time with your friends who are a good influence on you.

I encourage you to check out the series if you can. There is much more detailed info on how to love and be a light to those who aren’t encouraging you and how to step back from relationships that the Lord might be showing you need to come to an end.

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  • Emily (eatloveprocreate.blogspot.com)
    Posted at 06:02h, 23 October Reply

    Was just talking about this yesterday, how it’s sometimes hard to find friends that are A) normal B) not party animals but still like to have fun and C) who want the same things in life. It really is crazy how hard that becomes once you are 35 & 37 and still don’t have kids (at least in my area), but I’m constantly looking for new quality peeps….it’s all about quality not quantity of friends imho! Looking forward to checking out that series! Tnx!

  • Emily (eatloveprocreate.blogspot.com)
    Posted at 06:03h, 23 October Reply

    Oh, and happy engagement anniversary too! Muah! 🙂

  • Megan Davis
    Posted at 07:22h, 23 October Reply

    Happy engage-iversary! Hopefully yall can do something fun when he gets back 🙂

  • Elisha
    Posted at 07:52h, 23 October Reply

    No eye rolling from me 🙂 We celebrate the 17th of every month. It was the day we first reconnected since I moved away in the 8th grade and the date of when we got married 6 months later. I lived in IL and he lived in FL during our entire 6 month courtship so we used to have “dates” on the webcam…we would both get Taco Bell (it was the only restaurant we both had besides McDonald’s) and that was our date 🙂

    I loved your series on friends. I felt convicted because I have slowly turned into the person that cringes when my phone rings but I am quick to always text back. Starting today this will change. Thank you 🙂

  • Jessica
    Posted at 08:10h, 23 October Reply

    Love this! How true, social media and the ease of texting has really ruined the bond we build with friends. I think it has also made us feel the need to have high number of “friends” when in reality, how many of them do we actually invest in and live life with? Sometimes, I really miss the good old days where all you had was a phone, letters and slumber parties.

  • Aubrey
    Posted at 08:25h, 23 October Reply

    Happy engagement anniversary!!

  • Suzanne
    Posted at 09:03h, 23 October Reply

    Happy Engagement Anniversary!! (I always count those too!!) 🙂 xoxo

  • dspence
    Posted at 09:41h, 23 October Reply

    Happy anniversary!

    The Lord has recently been bringing one relationship to mind that, while this person is a VERY close friend, I need to be more mindful of my words and actions in their presence, as well as how much I share when we are together. Even though we are so close, this person is not a Christian and I need to guard my heart so that I can bring them to Christ without allowing them to draw me further from Him.

    It’s tough!

  • Amie
    Posted at 10:06h, 23 October Reply

    No eye rolling here at all, I think that’s awesome!! Happy anniversary!! All of this is so true. The big thing to me is exactly as you mentioned about social media. People don’t actually talk and visit with eachother as much anymore. I try often to actually sit down and write cards and mail them to people because people really don’t do that much anymore. Thank you for this reminder 🙂

  • Kara
    Posted at 10:08h, 23 October Reply

    Listening to it right now! thanks for the heads up about it 🙂 So with you on your friends being your future and walking with the wise not foolish! Have a great day!

  • Isabelle
    Posted at 10:54h, 23 October Reply

    You’re always such a good influence. Appreciate you summarizing the series. Happy anniversary! No eye rolling here either. My hubby counts the weeks that we’ve been together. He’d say, “Happy [number] weeks!”

  • Heidi
    Posted at 11:04h, 23 October Reply

    We got engaged and married in almost the exact same time frame! We got engaged on 11/11/10 and married on 4/16/11. Well that’s when we had our wedding. We actually eloped on 1/14/11 but we count them both. 🙂 Happy Anniversary. I totally agree with you about friendship. However, sometimes social media helps us to see who are our true friends and who aren’t. I’ve terminated a very long toxic friendship because of the ups and downs that came to light over FB. However sad that is it was actually much better for the quality and purity of my soul. Thanks for sharing such wonderful insights! I wished all us infertiles lived closer together!

  • Charity
    Posted at 12:25h, 23 October Reply

    Aww what a thoughtful post! Happy Anniversary to you and Colby!! I definitely want to check out this series, I don’t have very many friends that I consider to be close ones and the ones that are close to me live in Florida. But it is important to have friends that bring you closer to Christ and inspire you to be a better you.

  • PNG
    Posted at 12:51h, 23 October Reply

    Happy engagement anniversary! Love the idea of your friends making your future – beautiful!

  • Kasey
    Posted at 13:39h, 23 October Reply

    Happy Anniversary!

    This is so true! I have a group of women who I was very close with and their favorite thing to do is gossip about other women. One time while I was sitting with this group of women I realized as each women got up from the table they would talk about her and so when I went to the bathroom I realized that they were probably talking about me as well. It was hard to pull away from the group, but it was so important as that is not who I am or who I want to be associated with.

  • Rachel G
    Posted at 13:52h, 23 October Reply

    I remember every possible anniversary, too! Speaking of which, my husband and I have official been together for 3 years and 7 months today. 😛 These are really good thoughts on friendship–those deep, true friendships are rare, but oh-so worthwhile to seek!

  • Jane
    Posted at 14:02h, 23 October Reply

    Congrats on your engagement anniversary — I just read your engagement story, so cool! We celebrate all our anniversaries too, every day should be special, right?? I think it is so true that your friends influence your future. I’ll have to check out that series!

  • Amy
    Posted at 18:46h, 23 October Reply

    Happy engagement anniversary! I hope that when your husband gets back, you can celebrate together! Good, encouraging friendships are so special and important and it is so true that the more you spend time with someone, the more you become alike so it’s crucial to choose wisely:-) Thank you for all the encouragement and truth you speak into my life friend! 🙂

  • Risa
    Posted at 21:08h, 23 October Reply

    Happy engagement anniversary! I feel sad when people would rather text me than call me. Although I suppose back in the day, people said the same thing about talking in person rather than on the phone 😉 Thanks for this post! Happy ICLW!

  • Finley
    Posted at 06:15h, 24 October Reply

    Lovely post and congratulations to you both!!! So sweet! Bet it feels like yesterday!
    This has actually dawned on me a lot more as I’ve gotten older and friends have come and gone. That when you realise who is really there in the long run, its a reminder to definitely keep them close and keep in contact and YES not just via text/facebook – agreed! I’ve learnt over the years that ol saying about how “some friends are there for a reason and season or a lifetime” and what I will add to the end of that saying “but our God is here for eternity!” And I definitely need to fill my life with more God filled friendships!!!

  • cindy
    Posted at 06:15h, 24 October Reply

    Hi from ICLW…I def need to be a better friend sometimes…

  • Emma
    Posted at 12:25h, 24 October Reply

    Hi from ICLW! Happy Engagement Anniversary!!

    Thanks for the reminder on friendship 🙂

  • Jessica
    Posted at 15:18h, 24 October Reply

    Happy anniversary! I love the verse in proverbs 27, “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” I’m so thankful for the Godly friends I have!

  • Ashley
    Posted at 16:05h, 24 October Reply

    Hi Caroline! I nominated you for a blog award! Come by and check it out!
    Happy engagement anniversary! I always have to remind my husband, he never remembers! =)

  • torthuil
    Posted at 18:59h, 26 October Reply

    Happy anniversary(s)! When I remember, I will still say to my husband on the 17th of the month: Happy 3 year and ____ month anniversary! We giggle and enjoy the moment. There are enough sad things in life that it’s good to remember the happy ones as often as possible.
    Totally agree about friends. Your post reminded me to feel grateful for my friends, most of whom I’ve known for a long time, and have always been so accepting and supportive and inspiring, not just in what they say but by example.

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